Relationships. This is another one of my absolute passions and another pillar that I am adding to my current pillars in which to position yourself as an Expert.
With my regular Column in Kuier magazine where I focus on various relationship challenges and how to resolve such challenges, as well as with my Empathy & Relationships contribution on SABC Radio: RSG, I believe that I have established myself well enough to guide those in need of advice on how to build better relationships, how to improve their current relationships and what foundations to lay to ensure that you build great relationships from the start.
In my experience as a Life Coach, Relationship Expert and Counsellor, I have found that the majority of relationship challenges that people experience, could have been avoided if the parties involved in the relationship, had taken some time to talk about how they would respond to various issues that they may encounter in their relationship, at a later stage.
With my work regarding relationships, including the couple, in-law relationships, the relationship between parent and child and friendship, to name but a few, I have found that whenever I would ask whether this initial foundation was laid, people would say “but isn’t that looking for trouble where there isn’t any trouble?” And when I ask them whether they have insurance or medial aid, they immediately understand what I am getting at and why it is important to talk about the eventuality of challenges and how they would deal with such a challenge when it occurs, before they experience that challenge.
You see, when you talk about it before it occurs, there are no hurt feelings and you can actually talk about it in a rational manner. And because you have discussed it before a particular challenge occurs, you are very likely to handle it in a responsible and empathic manner.
Are you currently going through a relationship challenge?
Did you know that you could use your relationship challenge to position yourself as an expert?
Ok, maybe not during the time when you still experience the challenge, as a challenge, but certainly when you have worked through it and have put the hurt feelings behind you.
Because I was able to work through my hurt feelings due to relationship challenges, I was able to develop a training program, entitled: The Art of Letting Go of crippling emotional pain and/or prolonged anger. Even though the challenge was a tough one, every time after presenting it, whether it is during a public workshop, to a corporate group or in a one-on-one coaching session, I look back in gratitude, because I see that if it wasn’t because of that particular challenge, I would not have been able to do what I do. It is as if the challenge somehow brings you closer to your ultimate purpose. We normally disregard looking at it this way, especially when we are still consumed by anger and hurt feelings.
I had no idea that my past challenges would eventually contribute to my ability to turn a painful situation into a positive and powerful one. I had no idea that my in-law relationship challenge would result in an organisation that provide counselling to others. I never thought that it would result in various magazine and newspaper articles, television and radio interviews. I never thought that it would result to my titles as Empathy & Relationship Expert on RSG and Columnist in Kuier magazine. I had no idea that the last two would mean as much as it does to people today and I certainly had no idea that my difficult in-law relationship would result in my inbox being flooded by “thank you” notes.
I feel privileged and I want to help you turn your relationship challenge into something powerful as well. Perhaps you too could use your current challenge to position yourself as an expert. I would certainly love guiding more people with regards to doing this. It is all about identifying that opportunity that most people are not able to see. Look at your challenge in a different way I sincerely believe in the following questions, questions that I also share with clients when I present my program, entitled: The Art Of Letting Go of crippling emotional pain and prolonged anger. I have a few questions, but will share two with you. These are: 1. What else, other than what is obvious, could this mean? 2. What can I learn as a result of a particular challenge?
You’ll be amazed at the answers that these questions could bring you. My relationship challenges always have a purpose. What is the purpose behind yours?
Recognition One of the most rewarding things is to be recognised for what you do. I always say to my clients during a workshop or coaching session, that you should never call yourself an expert, not before others recognise you as such.
It is an absolute honour to be consulted on a regular basis by journalists writing for various reputable publications to contribute an expert opinion to an article that they are working on. At first I was obviously eager to contribute, because it is important to get ones name out there when it isn’t out there. Today I can actually decline some of these requests and refer some of them to some of my clients whom I know are also knowledgeable on a particular subject matter and would appreciate the publicity or to see their name in a magazine or newspaper.
Best wishes with using your relationship challenge to position yourself as an expert.
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